Oh Crap!

I've got more crap stories than any human being should have but that's what happens when your broken for 11 years and no one can figure out what is wrong with you. I can laugh now since I am fixed. Here is one for your enjoyment. 

It was a beautiful afternoon and I went for a car ride with my hubby while he made a few stops for work. I waited in the truck while he was inside one of the business's he needed to visit and it hit me....... I'm gonna crap my pants! Horrible stomach pain, profusely sweating, shaking and can only think about getting to a bathroom right now. You've all been there at least once in your life. I've visited this moment many times in the past and I knew I had to act fast. I look around and I am surrounded by offices and I couldn't chance them not letting me use their restroom or not having one so I moved over to the driver seat and drove half a block down to the Maverick gas station. I knew my hubby would find me since he unfortunately was well aware of my volcanic butt erupting at any given time. I raced into the gas station bathroom, flung open the door while undoing my pants and notice that the toilet is clogged! Aaaahhhh! I stand there in my sweaty panic and look at my options...... I decide, it must be done. Yep, I did it. I feel horrible for adding to this mess but was so relieved that it was in a clogged toilet and not in my pants. As I open the door to leave I am shocked to see that there is a line of 4 people at the door to use the restroom. With a red face I panic and run past all of them as fast as possible, running out of the store, jumping in the truck (happy that my hubby is sitting there waiting) and shout "Go, Go, Go!!!" Luckily we made a clean getaway. 

P.S. I am so sorry to whoever was on bathroom duty that day.